Posted by
tHe gR8 ~aDi~
at
5:39 PM
Statutory warning...must read
Statutory warning: I am not responsible for the damage done to your mental health, your social relationships, your image among peers or your job by reading this mail.
Those with blood pressure, please avoid. But never read only one. The effects are cumulative.
Q: How do you stop an elephant from charging?
A: Take away his credit card.
Q: Why is an elephant big, gray, and wrinkly?
A: Because, if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Aspirin.
Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?
A: Because it fell asleep.
Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It was glued to the first one.
Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It was a copycat.
Q: Why did the fourth elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It thought this was all a game.
Q: And why did the tree fall down?
A: It thought it was an elephant.
Q: What does an elephant and a blueberry have in common?
A: They're both blue, except for the elephant.
Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw 1,000 elephants coming over the hill?
A: Look, there's 1,000 elephants coming over the hill.
Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
A: With a blue elephant gun, of course.
Q: How do you shoot a red elephant?
A: No, not with a red elephant gun. You strangle him until he turns blue, then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a green elephant?
A: Tell him a dirty joke so he turns red, strangle him until he turns blue, then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a pink elephant?
A: First you bake a cake, and put 3 raisins on top, then you take it out in the jungle where the pink elephant will find it, and you wait. Eventually the elephant comes along, finds the cake, eats the raisins and throws the cake away. Then you go home and bake another cake and put 2 raisins on top, take it out in the jungle where the elephant will find it. The elephant comes along, finds the cake, eats the 2 raisins and throws the ca
Those with blood pressure, please avoid. But never read only one. The effects are cumulative.
Q: How do you stop an elephant from charging?
A: Take away his credit card.
Q: Why is an elephant big, gray, and wrinkly?
A: Because, if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Aspirin.
Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?
A: Because it fell asleep.
Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It was glued to the first one.
Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It was a copycat.
Q: Why did the fourth elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It thought this was all a game.
Q: And why did the tree fall down?
A: It thought it was an elephant.
Q: What does an elephant and a blueberry have in common?
A: They're both blue, except for the elephant.
Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw 1,000 elephants coming over the hill?
A: Look, there's 1,000 elephants coming over the hill.
Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
A: With a blue elephant gun, of course.
Q: How do you shoot a red elephant?
A: No, not with a red elephant gun. You strangle him until he turns blue, then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a green elephant?
A: Tell him a dirty joke so he turns red, strangle him until he turns blue, then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a pink elephant?
A: First you bake a cake, and put 3 raisins on top, then you take it out in the jungle where the pink elephant will find it, and you wait. Eventually the elephant comes along, finds the cake, eats the raisins and throws the cake away. Then you go home and bake another cake and put 2 raisins on top, take it out in the jungle where the elephant will find it. The elephant comes along, finds the cake, eats the 2 raisins and throws the ca
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